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Footnote: I actually hate this piece. I dont even know why I did it. Its really just a load of bullshit. I think I was in one of those stages where I was trying different things. The only thing that I think it does do is show the camera. I am really interested in the idea of mental cameras, or cameras in total, the idea that we can create our own memories one way or another. And also how going out drinking was an almost sacred affair and it changed you, made you different, I dont know, tanked you up, made you unstoppable, not that you wanted to actually do anything, but recording that to some extent was worthwhile. One of the reasons I hate this is because its got mohekans in it. I hate that, I never really knew what I was doing, it just seemed that I was drawing all my main characters fny haircuts because it made the comic seem more with it, more serious, but in effect its made me look like I was a punk or something which I wasn't. I was never anything, but to me it symbolises how I was swayed from what I truly wanted, GIRLS, like that if I had been doing stuff, for better or worse then that I am doing now my life might have been changed. You have to remember that this was before the internet, and that much of my world was governened by my immediate surroundings and I was influenced heavily by people that I really dont like now. I remember one time where I had done some work with a naked girl in it that my pal said he wouldn't buy my comic if it contained cheap porn, and it was like a controlling comment, when in fact, if he was a proper friend, he would have been better to say that he would only buy my comic if it contained cheap porn. Not that I like porn per se, but drawing girls is like a mental act of voting for what you want, where as falling into this false sense of coolness by drawing punks, who are by very nature, retards, was going in the wrong direction. They are antisocial, and verging on criminal. And of course its verging on the world of travellers and gypsies and other types of vagabonds. This strip makes me realise how much of an impact the internet has had on the world, or at least my world. Its a trange change because it really only effects people like me, people at the bottom. When I did this I was heavily swayed by my immediate environment which even then I hated, but I couldn't get away from it. I had no choice, I only knew a certain number of people, but since the internet has arrived I have been able to fill my mind with things that I want, and it changes the way you think, because you can meet girls and you think about them instead of your real world captores, you think of them and think, what would they want, what would they are not proper friends because you never meet them, you change your life to reflect that, to fit into their life, like you might try to dress smartly because they might like it better, where as in reality all your friends are drugies or punks or social outcasts and so theres the tendency to wear clothes that reflect that, clothees with holes in and such.
The last set of of panels was a copy of something that I had seen a long time ago, its about a guy thats on his way home from the pub and cant think of anything, and so his thought bubbles are empty, and in the last one he says dang, it seemed funny at the time, but I dont think this strip does that justice. What you can see quite clearly is how I went over the outline in a much heavier line which was something I did to draw the main elements out of what could often be a chaotic background. In short, I dont like the content of this page. I think that I drew it and it was half pencilled for a few years and then I went back and finished it with the stuff at the bottom. As far s the message goes, I really dont think its that profound. Beer and cigarettes destroying us? Well, eternal repression might be doing more harm.