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Footnote: Well, this is the first of a four pge piece I did whilst on holiday. I liked the title because its a very similar word to Partisan, but is so different. Trying to catch a hidden beauty. I dont know, it's like smoking I guess, you can draw image after image and they can be crap or mediocre, but occasionally you get a really good one. To give anyone interested some advance warning, yes, this is going to be as boring as Kent. Next up might be another manly issue of Patisan, I have the plot figured out, but for the time being you got Courtisan. Well, I like drawing this sort of stuff more than reading it. It tastes to little time to read. Still, for me it's all about creating my own world. Engineering my own experience. I think alot of this stems from my younger years, say 18-20. I was way into Leonard Cohen an Nick Drake as musicians. Going back to all that justifies my current perceptions now. I never stopped listenting to Loenard Cohen or Nick Drake, but I think I strayed from the principle belief, or was at least in a world that did not appreciate those types of sentiments. Songs of beauty without being perverted, pornographic or shameful. There is an age of bueaty around that time that is so brilliant. I would sing those songs to myself withou really understanding the lyrics. Not truly, but the songs were clearly about beauty. Joey, Clothes of Sand, Sally-Anne, The Sisters Of Mercy, Joan Of Arc, and loads more. I understood then. I dont feel a loss, but doing these drawings brings me back there, it sort of opens my eyes to visions I saw years ago and which truly drove me. I know my efforts are wasted in the great scheme of things. I had a major detour off of my own path recently and it was like Chef getting off of the boat in Apocolypse Now, I saw the tiger, saw what a waste all my efforts to convey 'art' or meaning really are, saw how shallow my immediate need to not be part of the things I dont like are, but at the same time I saw a greater resolve to fortify my belief in what I consider to be beautiful because there is so little of it left. I could go on talking crap here, so i'll stop, suffice to say that I have had a few more ideas on more silent adventures into beauty such as this. All I have to decide on is wether its worth it.